British Foods

All photos and written work copyrighted sstaas. All rights reserved.

Down in Key West shadows creep up ye olde brick wall. It will be evening soon and the buskers will be out and about entertaining the crowds. There is a huge Disney ship docked just down the road a bit. Tourists saunter about in gaudy tee shirts and loose sandals.

I spy a shop that advertises British foods and jaunt over quickly to inspect the joyful joint. It does look joyful! I'm almost certain I'll be able to purchase good old Branston Pickle and maybe some Cadbury Flake. Yum. Digestive Biscuits too? Yummer yum.



Inside the shop I'm gazing on the foods I used to eat growing up in Scotland. Wine gums anyone? A girl in her twenties appears at my side, reeking of booze. She speaks with an English accent.

"I've been boozing it up all day." That was her, not me, speaking, by the way.
"Oh?" We British tend to be polite. I really wanted to say to her that I could tell she had been drinking for she stank like dried up pee and vomit.
"My tummy aches. I really need Andrews Liver Salts."
"They still make that?" I hadn't thought about Andrews Liver Salts in years.
"Of course. And I love it! It always does the trick. What are you going to be buying? Oh, look! Maltesers! I love Maltesers!"



I leave the drunken girl in the shadows of the shop, pleased with my purchases, and wonder if she was from the Disney Cruise ship? I'll never know.

Do you ever shop for British foods?